You Say You Want A Resolution

2010 is going to be good. Cause I have goals.

1. Watch more movies. I just wanted to start off with something I could actually accomplish.
2. Figure out the theme of LOST, therein discovering the meaning of life.
4. Use less disinfecting wipes. It is an addiction.
5. Read 50 books. This will be a challenge because I'm pretty sure the Lehi library doesn't have 50 books that I haven't read. Unless you count the 50 copies of the Twilight Saga. But that isn't going to happen. Donations are welcome.
6. Hold a grasshopper. I'm not kidding people, I'm going to. I will probably pee my pants and throw up but I'm gonna do it. No more baby steps, this fear of mine is out of hand. I will be selling tickets if you would like to witness this miracle. Um, typing it out is making my heart rate go up. Can we find a volunteer paramedic to standby in case I have a heart attack?

I have some more, but I think this is a good start. What are your goals? Talk to me.

My Friend The Dead Construction Worker

I am not sure why dead people show up at our house. They do. Always at night when I am in bed. Collin told me the other night that there was a ghost in the house. I said "really, what does he look like?" He told me that he was a construction worker that started living in our house when it was built. Collin wasn't even born when our house was built. I'm hoping this is just a case of Maura sharing her paranormal experiences with her brother. The good news is that he is a good ghost. The even better news is that I can't see him.

I Heart Lists

If there is one thing that I love about the end of a year, it is the excuse to make LISTS. So here are a few for you. Please share some of your favorites from this year.

Best things about this year:

My Maximus. I like him. May was a high point of this year. He is the caboose on the little train that is our family. We ended on a high note for sure.

Sally is gone! Well... some of her impact still lingers, but I'm pretty sure she has crossed over.

I still have a job (fingers crossed for that one).

I still have a house.

My minivan. Once I accepted it for what it was we learned to love each other.

They sell Tim Tams at Target now. Go to the cookie isle. You won't be disappointed.

Lists. Can I put lists as something I love on a list? I think I just did.

Things I could have lived without this year:

Bed rest and more bed rest.

"Experienced" Doctors who forget that intestines aren't meant to be sawed in half.

Insurance companies.

Pretty much anybody in the medical field that I had to deal with.

Sara Palin and many, many other Republicans. Sorry, it had to be said. In all fairness, there are plenty of Democrats I can't stand as well.

Any books, movies or TV shows with vampires. I just don't get it.

Those creepy Old Navy ads with the mannequins. Time for a new ad campaign.

99% of what is on TV. Specifically:

Dancing shows, dating shows, and Jon & Kate.

People who tell me I have a bad attitude. What is so great about being optimistic anyway?

Those people stickers that are on the back of all the minivans and huge SUV's in Utah County. How about if you drive one of these cars I just assume you have a lot of kids and a cat and/or dog. Sound good?

Skinny Jeans: Die already! I am 5'2, it isn't ever going to happen for us!

Why is this list so much longer? Seriously, WHAT BAD ATTITUDE?

...From The Bottom of my HEAAART

We want to wish you a Merry Christmas. We hope you enjoyed yourselves. We certainly did.

Max was disappointed that there wasn't food in any of his gifts. He wasn't interested after he found that out.

Santa brought Collin a very unwelcome gift in the form of a nasty eye infection. By Christmas night it had spread to both eyes and his face was all swollen. He told me it was the worst Christmas. Sorry buddy!

Cute kids on Christmas Eve.

Collin: "mommy, I can't sleep. I had a bad thought."
Me: "I'm sorry, what was your bad thought?"
Collin: "A bulldozer ran me over."
Me: "Wow. That is a bad thought. I wouldn't let that happen. I would save you."
Collin: "What if you weren't there?"
Me: "Daddy would save you."
Collin: "What if daddy wasn't there?"
Me: "Somebody would save you."
Collin: "The construction worker?"
Me: "Yes, the construction worker would save you."
Collin: "What if the construction worker was mean. He would take me away."
Me: "He isn't mean, he is nice."
Collin: "No, he's mean and he will put me in his car and take me away. Is he going to?"
Me: (Sympathy waning) "Collin, he isn't mean."
Collin: "But how will he find you? Does he know where we live? Does he know you are my mommy? Will he make sure to put my seatbelt on? What if he takes me to the wrong house? Will you look for me? Will he make me ride in the scoop? I will fall out."

My head hurts.

Gone But Not Forgotten

In her own special way Sally has made her way back into our lives. You remember Sally, right? Well she burned her parent's house down...with them in it. Ever since then Maura has had an intense fear of fire. It calmed down for awhile but the past few weeks she wakes up (or never goes to sleep) crying that she keeps thinking we will die in a fire. I thought it would make it better to make an "escape plan" and talk about how we would stay safe if we did have a fire. That just made it worse. Any advice on how to handle nightmares? Preferably advice that doesn't involve me sleeping in a twin bed with a 6 year old all night.

Darn you Sally!

So, I have this problem. My baby won't stop being cute and fat. I will never be able to say no to those blue eyes! On a side note, Rand knitted this hat for him...while watching football. I knew I like him! It was kinda hard work getting it to stretch over his huge head.



He is now sitting, crawling and generally just being the cutest baby ever.


I felt like Max was getting all the love and I don't want to forget my other crazy kids.

Seriously...you didn't know?

Wow...nothin' like having a doctor accidentally saw your intestines in half to slow your life down to a screeching halt. I have had a lot of time to catch up on movies and books. Oh, who am I kidding, I watched TV for 2 weeks straight. Some highlights: Watched "The Jerk" and laughed so hard it hurt. Reruns of "Arrested Development" on IFC and everything on the Discovery Channel. But I did have time to watch a bunch of crap. There is actually a show called "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant." Have you seen it? It is real, like real people with real stories. THEY AREN'T MAKING THIS UP and that is what scares me. People who go 9 months not knowing they are pregnant (there are prerequisites for being pregnant people!) and then think they are just constipated when they go into labor. I have some experience in this area, so I feel I am justified in asking these women to please consider getting their tubes tied. Or at least lets not make a show about it, because it makes me sad for the human race. But alas, I did watch every darn episode of it so I suppose I am to blame.