Friday, April 27, 2012

Thursday I don't Care About You

Disclaimer: It is 5:00 am and I have been awake for awhile. Usually I'm miserable at these times but I just realized that they replay old episodes and new ones of 120 minutes on MTV at this time. If you don't know what I'm talking about, you missed out. Robert Smith really pulled off that look back in the day. Also, you aren't as old as me. It was a magical time, the 90's. There weren't reality shows and products being thrown at you every second of every day. Still, I wouldn't go back to highschool for all the money in the world. I had purple hair for goodness sake. Nobody pulls off purple hair.

So fast forward a few decades and I am sitting in my house with a husband and three sleeping kids. Does anyone else ever stop and think about where they are and just totally lose their sh*t? Sometimes I just realize that I am responsible for 3 lives and it really freaks me out. I realized the other day that I hadn't washed my hair in 5 days. And I ate fritos and oreos for breakfast. I can't raise kids! I was at the store and one of the kids yelled "MOMMY!" and I'm like, wait, that is for me! I'm a mom! How did this happen-how did someone agree to have children with me...willingly?  I'm not ready! I guess it is about 9 years too late for that though. I do, however, quite like those little people of mine. Even monster Max, ruler of the Brunos. He is exploring his vocal cords and the different noises he can yell at me when he is angry. We are really having fun with this experiment. He figured out that I can't lift him into time out so he puts up quite the fight.

Collin is about the opposite of Max in every way. He is Mr. Sensitive who decided sports weren't for him and he would rather sing songs and ride a skateboard while perfecting his hair flip for the ladies. Also, he is too old to call me Mommy, so it is just Mom. Don't forget it either.

Maura continues to defy logic by being the perfect child, despite the fact that I am raising her. Sometimes she comes home and I want to go and do something with her, but she won't allow it because she has more important things, like homework to do. And she trained Pearl the bird to say hello by lifting one foot (talon?) when you say "Hi Pearl!" I'm not that impressed because she still waits to take a crap until I'm holding her. (Pearl, not Maura).

So obviously I am still unemployed. It's okay though, I've had lots of time to lay around in my pajamas. Mostly because I realized that I don't own any casual clothes because I have worked in an office for the past 14 years. So I spend my days now in pajamas/work out clothes going to physical therapy. I don't much care for it. Call me crazy, but being tortured 2-3 times per week is just not my idea of fun. Plus their playlist to a healthier you includes Richard Marx and Enya. My physical therapist, Bob, is great. He isn't very chatty, but I will take a doctor that is good over a nice one any day of the week. I once had a nice doctor. And he almost killed me. My back/pain doctor is super nice. But there is something about someone saying "there isn't really much we can do for you, but have a great day!" in a really chipper voice that makes you want to take all the needles they shoved into you and put them into his eyeballs. I'm not going to, cause he is REALLY nice, but still. I can never tell if it is good news or not because the delivery is always the same and he always seems super excited to tell me how I'm never going to get better.

Anyway, I've really missed these middle of the night  posts (I realize people get up at this hour, but I can't relate to them because 5:00 is still the middle of the freaking night). I think it is time to go to bed when you think the Fray video isn't so bad.

Over and out.

3 comments:

Melanie said...

I wonder if your "There's nothing I can do for you" doctor is the same one I went to. I hate that jerk and his chipper voice.

Rachel said...

Mel, the thing is that I genuinely like my nice dr. I just don't want him to have anything to do with my treatment. I think he feels like he can make up for the fact that they aren't helping me by being my buddy. I dont pay buddies hundreds of dollars. If I did that would be an escort service :)

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