Is it ever good to have bronchitis? Well, I didn't think so until yesterday. I've been stricken with a pretty bad case of it and I have been miserably coughing my head off. I finally decided to drag myself into work yesterday (only to leave three hours later). But for a brief moment I was incredibly grateful for my obvious illness. Explanation to come soon.
I hate hugs, most people know this about me. Everyone likes to joke and put their arms out when I walk by and it is all sooooo funny, but I really don't like to hug people. Don't take offense, it isn't a personal thing, it is a personal-space thing. I like my space and I would rather not hug you most of the time. Of course there are exceptions. I hug my Grandmas every time I see them. I will hug you at your wedding, if I haven't seen you in a really long time, if you are dying, etc. I also hug my kids and my nieces and nephews all the time. Kid hugs are safe, adult hugs are not.
So I was leaving work yesterday and I ran into a former co-worker. We were never friends, never really talked that much. She saw me and said the words I dread to hear... "I need a hug." I only had a few seconds to think as she crossed the lobby to hug me. Then my hand involuntarily went up in front of me, blocking her. Crap, what do I say now? I just hug-blocked her and she is going to get her feelings hurt. Then I realized that I had a perfectly legitamite reason for not hugging her. "Oh, don't come near me, I'm so sick and I don't want to give it to you." It worked! She backed up and we parted with no hug. It was close. Thank you bronchitis.
So here is my question. Is it rude to refuse a hug? Just because someone else "needs a hug" should I comply because I feel socially obligated? Is there any nice way to say "No thanks, although you need a hug, I do not. But how about a nice high-five?"
**I think it goes without saying that I like to hug my husband, seeing as how I'm pregnant for the third time and all.
10 comments:
I think it's totally fine not to hug. That same person hugged me. You know how I feel about hugs too...
now i'm wondering if the two of you talk about how awkward i am. because i've hugged you both. because that's what i do.
Don't feel bad, at least I didn't block you, Kalli. I don't remember it being too painful, so it must not have been so bad :)
Next time I see you, I'm coming in for A BIG HUGE SQUEEZY HUG that lasts for like 9 seconds. That's going to be so fun for both of us.....
Good thing you don't live in a country where a kiss on each cheek are customary.
I kind of get the no hug thing. It just depends on the person. I'd say I'm also conscientious about personal space especially if I was never friends with that person.
I'm still looking for the answer to that question. I never know when I should/shouldn't hug someone and rarely want to hug anyone. I've been in too many awkard situations. Will we ever get it figured out?
I went an entire year without giving a high five anyone over the age of 12. I just told it was a New Year's resolutions and when they asked why, I said because it was a resolution I knew I could keep.
You should try it out!
I think there are a very FEW times a person actually NEEDS a hug. I mean, just because you see someone you know doesn't mean you "need" a hug. You may "want" a hug, but you don't need one. I find it very selfish of someone to demand a hug by stating it is a "need". Someone who actually needs a hug, usually is so upset that they don't ask for it anyway. Stand your ground! Next time someone says "I need a hug." look them right in the eyes and say "No you don't."
see people don't understand us, we are just not a huggy kind of family, so the tilt of the head and pat on the back will have to suffice.
Andrea, that is exactly what I was thinking. Even if they really do "need a hug" why are their needs more important than mine? I "need you" to back up and put your arms down. But it seems the huggers usually win.
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